Back In Trivandrum

How much ever i wanted to get away from this place Trivandrum , i always want to visit here , such a beautiful place , is that the reason ? i had to be honest .. no it was not , the memories i left here are worth savoring , the places i visited here are worth revisiting , what if it is a single chay at pangapara .What if it is a singe moment spent at the door step of my old room where i used to pick up delicious dinner from my friends.
What if it is a lonely walk on the medical college road , what if it is a solitary cigarette in the bike park of Bhavani where the chit chat sessions in rain would continue for hours.I Love this place and that is something i realized this time around.

It is like a itch which u scratch , happy till u keep scratching it ... but red hot rash when u leave it.....Hmmm Shangumugham bridge has not changed anything , and Sundar has not changed a bit .Probably it is sane to avoid coming here , but whatever i say now i know i am going to be back here.....

Tamil Semmozhi Manadu Anthem Video Song- A R Rahman

The Cricket OverKill

In headlines today , Indian team members in a pub brawl , eight months ago the same protagonist caught fighting in a pub ,we broke the news first then and now , looks like carribean curry is too hot for our guys, in other news Indian prime minister and US president met over the issue of terrorism

--- Past one week this is how the news channels reports seem to be giving more air time to most trivial and a page 3 incident , yes we are all disappointed and as self-appointed custodians of holding every other person to account of brining the nation to disrepute , we enjoy the bashing , the photos of the past , the public dissection and analysis of a troubled family .In pure cricketing terms we were outplayed and the better teams on that day prevailed , it hurts when someone you pinned hopes on failed and worse when you watch it sacrificing your sleep , but at the end of the day cricket is just a game and like in every game there has to be a winner and there has to be loser.

A loss of Indian cricket by no means authorizes us to pass judgements and burn down houses of the cricketers,if at all the anger should be directed towards BCCI who seem to be content with filling their coffers by playing the same team 40 times home away and then in a neutral venue. Why did we not travel to the kiwi land for 8 years ,agreed that we were made to play in grasslands and it was not a good advertisement for cricket , but then what does the board do , they do not send the team to the country for next 7 years ( logistics , FTP and crap ),what do kiwis do this time around , steal some strip from the golden quadrilateral and lay it in the ground , team makes merry beats a second grade test team with considerable ,come back and brag that this team has won in every knook and corner.

If the ball bounces bring back Dravid , if it is at a comfortable height let Raina make merry, the board is to be blamed for the debacles and in between all the money , hectic schedules and the legal tussles cricket somewhere is taking a back seat, like I said it hurts but then even Speilberg makes flop movies. The anger and hurt does not justify us wading in to the personal lifes of cricketers.

Next time you watch such stupidity on TV , do yourself a favour change the channel.

What do I tell you

What do you tell a person who is hurting to tell you a thing that's
going to hurt you? What do you tell a person who knows that to back
off and cut out is the best way out,but still is optimistic and
searching for a way to make it work, well finally what the hell is
wrong with me that i am thinking that way too.
Well when the world was born, it was probably about food that men
thought about, when we got smarter things got complicated, I love
simple things in life and like to keep my life simple, but somehow as
simple as the word simple seems to be ,acheiving it looks to be a
complicated thing.
Well committments aren't necessarily that strong when the
alternative path is easy to take, well its simple right ? makes life
much more easier,but was that the simplicity I was after.
More I think about it more complex patterns start to appear,the
easy alternative chosen is not always simple alternative, its again
influenced by complex logic, so is it logic what elavated human race
from the need seeker to luxury monger?
Back on to what can we tell the person who is already hurting , do
you share the hurt which is never going to reduce like in the simple
world that exists in the fantasies. Well how far can you push a person
who has his/her back to wall? I am searching for this answer for the
past week. What do I say to that face in mirror ?

--
Sent from my mobile device

Sundar M R
Picture abhi baaki he mere dost......

Love Sex Dokha

   I love watching movies, when I saw pulp fiction; I was left wondering when such movies will come home. We have so many talented movie makers, and a lot more movie goers who are bored to death with the 6 songs 4 fight movies. Here was the answer, the age of spy cameras and mms has come here to stay, LSD will leave you with a disturbed mind, a lump in your throat and I guess it will make lot of talented people out there with a handy camera shoot movies.

    The title display was so Quentin Taratino’ish , I was left wondering when was the last time I felt so good 2 minutes in to the movie , the 3 stories are interwoven seamlessly without effort . I hated Ekta for spoiling my evenings in probably 3 different languages, but this might be her Rashomon moment. This is one such movie where the plot takes back seat and the characters assume the center stage, no breaks for a cigarette during that unruly song or no moment to check that fold under your girl friend’s neck, this movie captures your attention and never let’s it go, for the 108 minutes it slides through the screen.

    Like OLO, the characters and their handling are so beautiful, the morning shift girl in the store who has a Russian lover is the one that will stay with me for a while, she is so very clichéd, but then she makes your heart go for the night shift lady who forms the crux of the second story, betraying more would be a injustice to the movie. This is what a realistic cinema is or the closest cinema could get to be real. The interweaving of one story to other actually adds something to the other two, this technique is now well documented in multiple story line movies, but this one is the closest it can get to perfection.

    In this age of sensational stories and unedited footage fed in prime time, LSD is a very honest attempt and the director has his heart at the right place, something is changing in Indian Cinema, in the space of two months there have been two good movies VTV and LSD and an impostor MNIK which could have been, LSD is Howard Roark of the cinema’s this year.
    Violence and sexuality is extreme ,but we were not promised otherwise , the trailers don’t do justice to the movie , it does not prepare the audience for what is going to hit them , we need more Dibakar’s and Anurag’s , bring them on , marry multiplex movies to the common audience.

4.5 Out of 5

Hunger

Look at me I am here
Summer's Gone Winter is here

Look at me I am here
Heat is gone , but the hunger stays

Lots of things you have to throw
Not one that makes me full

Look at me I am here
Summer's gone , Winter is here

Seasons change , your fashions change
But my rags are still on

People stop , throw a glance
Faces turn, not my choice , are my looks

Winter is gone , so is the year
Destiny's child , hunger still here

Lots of love in the world to share
All I need is a soul to care

Blood in veins , mine to sell
Don't look for me , I don't need the care

Winter's gone so has the hunger
Donno if I can still see the summer

Don't look for me I am gone
Bones still fear , for there may be hunger

Two Mad Guys and a Lancer

Monday night 11:30 , After a plateful of Chowmein ,( I would say spaghetti , but my friend will kill me , she had cooked it , I will let her name it ) and a cup full of coffee , me and Arun set out on the trip to Bangalore from Pune , this trip was about 837 kilometers and I was having a bad cramp near my right shoulder , sanity said take a break , drive in the morning , but would we be us if we were sane , so with Love Aaj Kal playing blasting out from my Nokia 5800 we set out to Bangalore.

The night travel was a revelation , we did want to take a deviation to Mahabaleshwar but I guess it had to wait for some other day , the pain in my next started to descend towards my right elbow and finally I had a throbbing pain all along the shoulder , the highway was a beauty and the car was flying , I did not want to interrupt the flow and we stopped for a tea near Kashil , by this time I had tried different postures to reduce the pain and Arun was down to 60 from 140 KM’s per hour , a tea and a roasted corn did

not thing to raise the spirits and we decided that we should drive till Kolhapur and rest for the night , but 30 kilometers in to the travel , the pain was unbearable and the night pitch dark , my thoughts wandered to the discussions me and my manager used to have about driving hazards on highways and with me sleeping we decided that a halt was of primary importance , after knocking at a couple of inns we found our self at a small hotel , and parked ourselves in a dingy room ( was A/C of course ) . When we woke up the next day, the sun was beautiful and there was a small stable next to the hotel, the view from the fourth floor was nice and I had a good time capturing some of the moments of my life on the D40x.

The pain was very less compared to previous night and having rejuvenated ourselves with a cup of coffee, we hit the pedal at 8:30 towards Kolhapur, it was bright and sunny and all indications were for another hot and humid summer day , 20 kilometers in to the drive , just before entering to Kolhapur we were surprised to find thick fog covering the road reducing the visibility to 10 meters or less , Nikon time’s again , we stopped to admire the beauty it was ( not that we could see anything ), but fog on a summer day and with no indication made us halt and think about the Munnar days from the past .

9:30, breakfast time and we obliged the angry growls from the stomach, Dosa in Kolhapur 800 miles north to its birthplace, the Sambhar was sweet and I could not find out the ingredients of the chutney, but we were famished and lassi made sure that we forgot the breakfast and drove ahead. The Sun was on his way to his destination as we put miles behind us, welcome to Karnataka was not where to be seen , but thanks to Airtel I got to know where I was, the only strange thing for me in this travel was that, as far as I could see on both sides of the road, there was not a single tree to be seen, it was a red sand desert.

Nothing exciting happened for another two hours and I dozed off, only to hear a swear word and to be jolted out of my comfort. A Lorry driver had put on his left indicator to change lane and somehow at the final moment decided to go right and we had to abruptly break , that was the closest brush with disaster we had till then , the sun was sweltering hot by this time and the engine was grumbling. The fuel indicator got me worried, but Arun was said it was safe for another 50 kilometers, let us hit Hubli. 5kms in to the journey, the fuel indicator was on and we had to turn back to fill the tank, Strange enough the service man at the fuel station did not understand Hindi, then Arun tried Kannada and we were not brave enough to use Tamil, National pride some other day, once the fuelling was done for 2000 rs, the Service Man started to say two words which got me worried, very worried indeed, No Card only Cash and we had about 1 percent of the cash with us. We suggested that one of them come with us to a nearby ATM and we would drop them back here, I guess this one had watched too many English horror movies and instead suggested that one of us stay back while the other got the money. Thus I got to know close up how a petrol pump works; I even filled tanks for a couple of passing by tanks and learnt how to program the machine in terms of both money and quantity of the fuel.

The owner took pity on me when he knew that I was a software engineer and enquired on my health and how much I bleed my industry per month, I was getting restless with his English and he with my Tulu, but magically enough we understood each other, after all we are Indians, Arun came back and we hit the road again with a moong dal packet the owner gifted me. I did not eat it then, My mother had always cautioned me against eating biscuits from strangers in a travel, though this guy was a owner of a petrol pump I could not quite come over that feeling, out it went through the window once we crossed a safe distance

At 2:30, we passed by a college on left and to the right stood huge statues of Mahaveer Jain, I do not remember the place, but the statues were astounding, standing there, in middle of now where , we got down the car and went in to the dhabha nearby for lunch , this particular dhabha will always be etched in my mind , no not for the food , but for a dog I saw there , it was easily 3/4^th of my height , and my dog enthusiastic friend wanted a photo with it , I was sure that one of his hands or leg will stay forever in that dhabha and I had to drive the rest of the distance , but nothing of that sort happened , the dog turned out to be one lazy creature , it just posed for the camera . I maintained a safe distance just to be very sure. Arun had to take break and we stopped by a small village deviating the NH and finding a tree , I climbed on to the tree and sat on it gazing at the ongoing traffic and not even a single bike passed by without stopping to have a look at me , this particular feature of people always amazed me , no wonder how much ever hurry we might be in , we would always stop to stare , we are one enthusiastic bunch ,when it encounter something strange , I guess that is why PDA is less in India as opposed to other nations.

The blazing heat gave away to a pleasant evening the nicest I have seen for months now, we had reached Chitradurg by around 6:00 in the evening and the sunset was beautiful, I was unlucky not to have caught a single sunset in KanyaKumari. The colors today was beautiful, I was never good with art and one picture which I always drew good was Amoeba and the other was that of a sunset, be it with a background of an ocean or the a hill, this was my favorite piece of art and the colors that surrounded the sun on this particular evening just blew me away, I had to be quick the sunset was fast and I almost missed it, a couple of shots turned out to be good, amateurish but a good. A few more miles and we saw a bush fire raging through whatever shrubs it could devour on a nearby hill, the journey from here on was arduous as NH4 turned out to be horrible for around 90 kms and it took us a good three of hours to reach Tumkur. We finally hit Bangalore at 11:30 our looks resembled those of the rider in the cowboy movies, muddy boots, unkempt hair, tanned skin. The journey took us almost 18 hrs at an average speed of about 60 with pit stops, but it was fun, it gave me lot of insight of what to expect in northern Karnataka and would serve as my first long trip on a single day.

Diversity in Food

“Why has it always got to be Sambhar buddy “,my north Indian friend shouted at me , I wanted to say , dumbo get off your roti and a kilo of butter first , “ I like it “, came my meek answer .

“Mom’s Sambhar is the best”, I said wanting to convince him and make him believe that Sambhar and idly are the best things that has happened to man, since dietary menu was created,

”You should come home one day and have my mom’s Sambhar and you for the rest of your life will keep asking for it” I said,

He made a face and then gave it a thought and after a couple of minutes asked me, “How will roti taste with Sambhar!! “

Last Sunset

Rays of Gold and Orange
Meeting the serene blue
Tired birds flocking home
Desperate waves trying to hold on to the shore
Smoke from a nearby hut
Wafting scent of fresh cooked fish
Kites flying high in the sky
Kids running for the ball
Church bells ringing in the background
And a choir singing Jingles
That was how it was
That last sunset, at my favorite bridge

Shangumugam Bridge

There is a long bridge near Shangumugam beach and the best part of it is that you are allowed to drive your bike till the tip of bridge.We used to visit that place quite very often, some of our nice friendships developed there. Sitting on the rock there and watching the vast expanse of the sea spreading before us and below us with waves lashing at the pillars of the bridge was an awesome experience.The last time when I went there, there was a strong feeling of nostalgia, the silhouette of the bike pulled me to the past, the stories I thought about sitting on the bridge, the poems I wrote looking at the ocean, the fun we friends had when the bike got stuck in the sand, and the reality that I might never ever visit that place again. Some part of me never boarded the bus to Bangalore that Sunday evening .The bridge and its raw beauty , the sea and its ferocious waves , the serenity of the church behind it , the playful kids with their volleys below , the fisherman and their nets , the memories of times spent with friends there .It was strange that how I never got to see a single sunset despite being there almost every other week , finally when I got the will to get my bike back , it was time for the bridge to show me it’s one last bout of affection , the wheel got stuck in a gap between the slabs of concrete ,I could feel my friends standing with me , walking with me and pulling the bike out for me and saying how they wish they could be there with me for one more time.

Angel

In the evening over my balcony
flew an angel spreading bright light

I saw , I was speaking to her
she answered with a little smile

I could hear her voice in me
calling for a new begining

I felt like a feather
floating over in a gentle breeze

she was so beautiful at heart
took away my sorrow with words

suddenly I could see her face
It was you my friend it was you

My Way of saying thank you to all those who stood by my antics for past 10 months

A Thought from Past

Found it in my archives folder , thought I could well post it here

Days I was with you
I never realized what that touch meant

Now I crave for one moment
I pray for that one moment of proximity

Days I was with you
I never realized what you were

Now I know that you are the one
Can't wait for a day , can't wait fora night

Days I was with you
Never realized how warm would that hug have been

Now I want the warmth but
I know that , that one hug is far from me

Days I was with you
Never realized that glint in your eye

But now as I dream about you
Can't wait for a day , can't wait for a night
to see that glow in your eye

Days I was with you
I never realized what it was between us

Now that love has hit me
Can't wait for a day , can't wait fora night

Opinions that made me halt and think

I remember certain events precisely in my life and the words spoken by my friends, my relatives and even the conversations I overheard in trains, buses. This is an attempt to acknowledge the effect they have had on me, some of them hurt while some brought about an uninhibited laughter

One of my friends said to me “ When there are lot of things going bad in your life , take them each separately and never ever try to relate them for there is always a way to hook up these things and the only thing it leads to is more chaos” , this works out brilliantly enough for me.

My relative was speaking to one of my friends and was saying “the most straightforward person in our family “, the wry smile on my friends face told me that I wasn’t the same while with friends, but I made it a point to work on it from that day and to this day when I wake up that is the first thing I think about.

This one is a gem and I still ROFL when I think about it, We were discussing what a condom does and one of my friend asked what happens when u have sex with condom, pat came a reply from another friend “It’s like wearing a raincoat and trying to get wet in rain, nothing really happens” (We were in our 14^Th or 15Th year then)

Then there was a issue with the shares of the money we had spent on a trip and two months down the lane I was still unable to repay the debts, one of my then friends offered me an advice, “You have got to get money from a place where you need not repay it, until that happens you are never going to get out of this “.

I was totally broke due to my adventures in my final year 1^st semester and had nothing but a couple of rupees left in hand, I searched my trunk box and found a small pouch of coins that I had not used and had collected just for the sake of it, the happiness I got that day cannot be probably matched with anything yet in my life, I learnt that saving really helps even if unintentional

“I would die for you, but I couldn’t and wouldn’t live for you – Howard Roark Fountain head” probably the last message my best friend sent me. Well, never try to change what is not yours to change, take a person as he is.

“I don’t love you and if you do not want to believe that what can I do? “, Love is not forever, it changes as does all the things in the world.

“Take this cash and solve your problems , after all you are my son” , when my bad debt had reached the ears of my father , a small unrelated incident which made me understand what a family is all about.

“America invented a pen which could be used to write in space craft which costed lakhs of dollars? Why not use a pencil? “Well looks smart the questions doesn’t it , but when someone else told me that under zero gravity a broken pencil tip could cause a hell of a lot of damage I started thinking …

When Aamir was American for me

This Saturday I was flying to Pune from Bangalore and I had this Hit maker edition of India Today with me and Aamir was smiling at me, somehow I was transported back to my childhood days or say teenage (for I really graduated in to my teens in my 16Th year) .It was in my 8th standard or probably 9th I don’t remember correctly, Rangeela had released and was dubbed in to my native language Telugu , it was hyped to be the best movie of the year and there was some other movie called Kuch to pagal tha , that was what my friends would tell me the name was , which I later found out was Dil to Pagal Hai and some Sharukh Khan was the hero.

I used to live in a stretch of houses which had cement tiles for roof and was like a ghetto ( now really thinking back about those days where some waste paper and rubber band’s would become cricket balls and a wooden stick would be a bat and we would play in the streets bindaas , makes me crave for it ). For the five families which lived there, only one house hosted a television with DoorDarshan as a sole channel, Chitrahaar was our only source to Hindi filmy world.

With this background set , when Rangeela released in that year in Telugu , having seen some censored wall posters on the way to school , we wanted to see the movie . I went to my Dad and pulled up the courage to ask him to take me to the movie , My dad looked at me as if I had spoken a swear word one and said that I shouldn’t watch such movies and he would not take me. I did not have the courage to prolong the discussion, but every now and then during class breaks I would hear my friends whisper in class about how his father was discussing with his guests about the acting prowess of the hero called American in the movie Rangeela, and the pronunciation added to the whispering made me assume that the name of the hero was American. I used to wonder why is an Indian guy named American and then I reason myself with some other filmy knowledge , Konidella Siva Sankara Vara Prasad was Chiranjeevi ,s o this guy should have named himself fancy as his name must have been as long as the megastar’s .

I used answer the same in quizzes which were conducted in school or outside for fun and get away with the answer for my pronunciation was as bad as theirs and the quizmasters would hear Aamir Khan (which they want to hear).No one ever corrected me and I never bothered to check his name up on the posters, Urmila was good enough for me. Years later, I bunked my classes when I was in my 12th (I think so) and went for this movie Mann with one of my friends, and there I happened to see this name flashed on the screen “Aamir Khan “. I started to laugh and my friend was amused, He did not know why, only I knew how stupid I felt that day.

The thought brought me a good laugh and I burst out laughing loud only to see the confused face of my co-passenger.